


Captain/ Doctor For A Day

by krislynrose



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Adorable Pavel Chekov, Annoyed Leonard "Bones" McCoy, Arguing, F/M, Identity Swap, Implied Sexual Content, James T. Kirk Being an Idiot, Kissing, Personality Swap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:40:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25888984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/krislynrose/pseuds/krislynrose
Summary: Kirk and Bones get into a fight, and as punishment, they dress and act like each other for a day.
Relationships: Chekov/Maya, James T. Kirk & Leonard "Bones" McCoy, Pavel Chekov/Original Female Characters, Spock (Star Trek)/Original Female Character(s), Spock/Maria
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	Captain/ Doctor For A Day

**Author's Note:**

> *I only own the Swanson sisters.*

"DAMMIT, JIM!! STOP TRYING TO GIVE ME A DAMN HEART ATTACK!" Bones screamed.

"Sorry, Dr. Cranky," Kirk laughed.

"Captain, is everything a joke to you?" Maria sighed.

"Funny things are," Kirk told her.

"I do not understand as to why you seek pleasure in scaring someone," Spock said.

"I seek pleasure in a lot of things. Even just looking at Maria," Kirk said.

"Why? Why would you want to look at another man's girlfriend?" Bones questioned.

"Yeah, that's like breaking the bro code," Sulu said.

"Spock, your girlfriend's hot," Kirk said.

Maria noticed a tint of green on Spock's cheeks. "Just ignore him, ashayam," she said.

"Ignore me? Come on now! Everyone loves the James T. Kirk," Kirk bragged.

"Stop acting like it's all about you. Just because you're Captain of this ship doesn't mean you're the most important person in the world," Bones said.

"Blah blah blah, whatever you say, Gramps," Kirk teased.

"Jim, stop it. Now," Bones warned.

"You're just a grumpy old man," Kirk joked.

"I'm warning you," Bones said.

"Grandpa," Kirk said.

"If Bones is the grandfather, does that make me the great-grandfather?" Scotty asked.

"Nah, you'd be the cool uncle. Bones is the grandpa because he's a grumpy old man," Kirk laughed.

"That's it!" Bones yelled, tackling Kirk, both of them fighting.

"Stop! Both of you stop!" Maria yelled, trying to break them up.

Uhura stepped in to help her. "Seriously, you two need to stop," she said.

"Spock," Maria said.

"Of course, ashayam," Spock said, pinching Kirk and Bones, knocking them out.

"Should we carry them to their rooms?" Sulu asked.

"Leave them. I'm too old for this," Scotty said.

"When they wake, I have a punishment planned for them," Maria snickered.

* * *

Kirk woke up to someone poking his face.

"Keptin Kirk?" Chekov said, poking Kirk's face.

"Pasha, Dr. Bones is not waking," Maya said, concerned, while poking Bones' shoulder.

"Dammit, Jim! Stop poking me!" Bones said, suddenly sitting up.

"Dammit, Bones! You're always blaming me for everything!" Kirk argued.

"Uh, Captain? Doctor? My sister wants to see you two," Maya said hesitantly.

"Ah! Maria!" Kirk squealed.

Bones rolled his eyes while following the Captain.

* * *

"I can't wait to see their reactions!" Scotty laughed. The crew was in Maria's office: Scotty, Uhura, and Sulu on the couch, Spock on Maria's desk chair, Maria on Spock's lap, and Chekov on a spare office chair, laughing, with Maya spinning him.

"Here they come," Spock said as Kirk and Bones walked in.

Maya stopped spinning Chekov and sat on his lap, the Russian wrapping his arms around the girl.

"Hello, gentleman. Have a seat," Maria said, gesturing to the two chairs in front of her desk.

"We having a party here?" Kirk asked.

"Actually, no. Earlier, after your fight, while you two were knocked out, I had a thought. You two fight a lot, and I was thinking of your punishment," Maria told them.

"Please don't make me dress up as a gorilla," Kirk begged.

"No. You two are going to dress up and act like each other," Maria said.

"WHAT?!?!" Kirk and Bones shrieked.

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I got everyone to agree with it. We were all fed up with your fighting so that is your punishment. Now, I want you to go to each other's rooms and change clothes," Maria said.

"Do we have to wear each other's underwear as well?" Bones asked.

"Oh no. Just your shirts," Maria said.

The Captain and Doctor sighed as they went to each other's rooms to change their shirts.

* * *

"This is humiliating," Kirk whined, stepping out of Bones' room, wearing his blue shirt.

"Oh look at me! I'm Captain James Tiberius Kirk! Look at me, everyone! Look at me! I'm so sexy and I know it! Look at me!" Bones yelled, wearing Kirk's yellow shirt.

"Dammit, Jim! Stop being so damn cocky, dammit!" Kirk yelled.

"Hello, ladies! Gorgeous as always! Especially you, Nyota," Bones said, winking at Uhura, making her blush.

"Dammit, Jim! Stop scaring the girls away, dammit!" Kirk shouted.

"Doctor, you're such a buzzkill, you buzzkill!" Bones whined.

"Dammit, Jim! I'm a doctor, not a buzzkill!" Kirk screamed.

"Buzzkill! Buzzkill! You're a buzzkill!" Bones mocked.

"Dammit, Jim!" Kirk said.

"Dammit, Bones!" Bones said.

"Dammit, everyone! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit, Spock, you hot, damn, sexy, robotic, green-blooded, pointy-eared PSYCHOPATH!" Kirk yelled.

"What did Spock ever do to you?!" Bones asked.

"You called him sexy and a psychopath. I'm so confused," Sulu mumbled.

"Does anybody want lunch?" Chekov asked.

"Dammit, Chekov! I'm a doctor, not a chef!" Kirk yelled.

"What did you yell at Chekov for?! He didn't do anything! He was simply inviting us for lunch!" Bones yelled at Kirk.

"It's ok, Pasha. It's ok," Maya said, holding her Russian boyfriend.

"He yelled at me!" Chekov sobbed.

"Oh hell no! Nobody makes Chekov cry and gets away with it! Hell no!" Sulu said.

* * *

'I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. Oh no, Spock's butt! Damn you!' Kirk thought, watching Spock walk by.

"Were you just ogling Spock's ass?" Bones asked.

"Damn him and his Vulcan ass," Kirk said.

"Maria's one lucky gal," Bones said.

"Maria! How much longer do we have to do this?" Kirk asked.

"Until tomorrow. But however, I will be nice. You two can change back to your normal clothes today if you two share a kiss. On the lips," Maria said, standing next to Spock.

"Pucker up, Bonesy," Kirk said.

"I'm not kissing you, dammit!" Bones snapped.

"Come on! I don't want to be you anymore!" Kirk whined.

"Well deal with it because I refuse to kiss you," Bones said.

* * *

"I can't take it anymore!" Kirk shrieked, squeezing his spoon. "Bones! Just kiss me!" he yelled.

Bones kissed Kirk on the cheek.

"Maria said it had to be on the lips," Kirk whined.

"I'm not gonna do it," Bones said.

"You look better in yellow anyways. Blue sucks," Kirk teased.

"You're just saying that to provoke me. I ain't kissing you," Bones said.

"Dammit!" Kirk said.

"Keptin Kirk! Commander Spock and Lieutenant Commander Swanson are both kissing on ze Keptin's chair," Chekov said, running into the cafeteria.

"And I think they're about to do more," Maya said.

"WHAT?!?!?!" Kirk and Bones shrieked as they stood up and ran.

* * *

"There's nobody in here," Kirk whispered.

"Spock! Maria! Ensigns Chekov and Swanson said you two were playing tonsil tennis in here," Bones said.

"And you're about to do the horizontal tango," Kirk said.

They both heard moans. As they walked closer to the Captain's chair, they saw Spock on the chair with Maria straddling him, grinding her hips on his, with Spock's hands under Maria's dress.

"Yeah! Get some, Spock!" Bones encouraged.

"Dammit! No! You're gonna contaminate my chair!" Kirk complained.

"Didn't think Spock had it in him," Bones said.

"Right! I expected Spock to be like a dead fish in bed, but I was wrong," Kirk said.

"Kiss me," Bones said.

"I'm sorry. What did I just hear?" Kirk asked with a smirk.

"Dammit, just kiss me so we can switch back to our normal clothes, and maybe they can stop snogging in front of us," Bones said.

"I thought you'd never ask," Kirk said as he and Bones shared a kiss. On the lips.

"Well done. I guess your punishment is over," Maria said. "Now if you'll excuse us. We need privacy since we're literally stuck together," she added.

Kirk and Bones were horrified and they ran out.

Kirk ran to a trash can and threw up. "I can't believe they had sex on my chair!" he whined.

"As long as I get my blue shirt back, I'm happy," Bones said.

"I need a new chair," Kirk said.

* * *

"I can't believe they fell for that!" Maria laughed, standing up. They were both fully dressed the entire time.

"They must know it is highly illogical to have intercourse outside of the bedroom, especially when there are people around us and they can easily see us," Spock said.

"It shows us how gullible people can be," Maria said.

"Indeed," Spock agreed.


End file.
